Who doesn’t like to dream about walking on the outskirts of Tsukiji Fish Market taking in (literally) the best o-toro from each vendor as you eye the uni two stalls down. But this post is not about that, it is about what you eat when it snows in Calgary every second day in May, when your parents are having difficulties attaching an attachment to an email even though you have told them about the paperclip icon 47 times and when you specifically asked for more room in your Americano, only for the barista to fill it up to the top purposely because she had a fight with her boyfriend that morning about a left fork in the sink and she wants to make everyone’s life miserable. This post is about those moments, about guilty pleasures, specifically one of mine.
Being in the food industry, people assume that dinners consist of a rotation between home made pasta, fois gras and 12 oz rib eyes. But when you need to escape, throw on your favourite basketball shorts, put on a rerun of a Seinfeld episode and eat something while you laugh to Poppy being a little bit sloppy, what is better than a 45/35 three cheese pizza pop x 2.
Let me delve a little further into this. In my lifetime I have eaten my fair share of pizza pops. I have tried them on the BBQ, I have tried them in the oven, I have tried them on a non stick pan on both a convection stove and a gas range, but nothing beats a pizza pop from the microwave that has been warmed up on a non-denominational paper towel for 45 seconds on one side and 35 the other. The 45/35 pizza pop is so good that you endure in life burns to the top of your mouth many times over and you now know that you bite one end of the pizza pop right out of the microwave to let it vent for 2 minutes, the perfect time to empty your bladder. Do you savour this moment? No! Because you know that 2 pizza pops come in one plastic package and you can’t risk putting the other one back in the freezer due to freezer burn, and so there is another one on the counter, lonely, waiting for you, waiting for a paper towel that has been folded in half, waiting for the turnstile of the microwave, waiting to be eaten after 1 min and 20 seconds and a 2 minute venting period. (AJ).